Compounding Wisdom
Connect Your Dream to Reality
The Power of Your Subconscious Mind
To Connect Your Dream to Reality
The Power of Your Subconscious Mind
To Connect Your Dream to Reality
Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.
Carl Jung (1875-1961)
Do you recall the first 6 Secrets of Success?
A Desire or a goal that you envision to be real. A dream you deeply desire.
Faith in the attainment of that desire beyond all doubt.
Your subconscious mind does not know imaginary from reality, nor right from wrong (the realm of your conscience), so you can use Autosuggestion to embed the faith in your desire into your subconscious deeply.
Specialized knowledge allows you to master what aligns with your purpose—the cornerstone of your impact.
Imagination allows you to build your desire in the workshop of your mind, creating a blueprint with all the details.
Organized Planning organizes this living blueprint, bringing each step closer to reality.
Decision empowers you take swift unwavering action. It sets you in motion from the inside out.
Persistence gives you the resolve to continually pursue your goal, even when the obstacles seem insurmountable.
The Mastermind principle is about surrounding yourself with individuals who challenge and uplift you, creating a synergy that elevates everyone in the Mastermind.
These next two energize inside and all around you, making things happen that seem almost miraculous.
10. The Subconscious Mind
The Connecting Link
Whatever we plant in our subconscious mind and nourish with repetition will one day become a reality.
Earl Nightingale (1921-1989)
Your subconscious mind is part of your soul (psyche) where your beliefs, desires and actions converge. It stores every thought, ultimately guiding your actions and reactions.
Steve Jobs used his subconscious to a high level. His perfectionism and unrelenting pursuit of excellence, simplicity and elegant design for human interaction and beauty were rooted in his subconscious beliefs that nothing less than the best for humanity would do.
Application: I believed I would become a doctor at age 14. I believed I would be a part of the Internet in 1992. I believed I would be gifted with business wisdom and great wealth as a result and that I would have my Magnum Opus in three different businesses in three different fields. I believed I would help Canadian riders become pro cyclists. A couple of months later I was invited to be a partner of a pro cycling team, Israel Premier Tech. Chris Froome, four time Tour de France winner is a good dear friend and I’ve ridden at the Tour with him and Michael Woods, a Canadian runner turned pro cyclist. I just adore them and the pro cyclists. Their hard work and dedication are inspiring. And my partners on the team, Billionaire Sylvan Adams, Ron Baron and Jean stand for greatness.
Wisdom: Program your subconscious with your highest ideals. Trust that it will guide you toward the actions you need to take, allowing your dreams to manifest through aligned effort. I believe when your subconscious mind is aligned with the Spirit of God, what is in your heart will manifest in powerful ways, but oftentimes in ways you do not quite expect or understand at that time.
11. The Brain
A Broadcasting and Receiving Station for Thought
The brain is wider than the sky.
Emily Dickinson (1830-1886)
The brain is not just a physical organ but a transmitter of thought. When you harnes it, you can connect with the collective ideas of others, drawing inspiration from the world around you.
When Elon Musk mired his brain with visions of space travel, robots for the good of humanity and a fair financial social network, he would call X. It was much too early and so X merged with Paypal and eventually sold to eBay. He has created SpaceX to go to Mars by developing reusable rockets, Tesla to build autonomous electric vehicles that are energy efficient and give back to the grid ultimately and robots that would serve humankind.From learning physics to engineering, he asks big questions to allow his brain to think and intuitively piece together solutions that are executable.
Application: My mentor Bob Proctor said most people don’t think. 95% of people don’t really think. I thought about that and realized it is hard to think, think deeply for a long time. So I started to ask myself questions and then think about the possible principles and concepts and elegant solutions based on different industries and walks of life.
I am fundraising for how.com. It’s the first time ever I have fundraised since I first started business in 1999. The vision is so big. We believe it will reinvent how travel is booked, how shopping is done, how people feel and how companies will operate. We valued it at $50 million, hoping to raise $4m and then invite strategic investors to invest more to have strategic investors upon launch. We are already oversubscribed. Then I thought of all the people who helped me and invited them and more than half were interested and of them, more than 70% are investing. Then I thought of more people who helped me along my life way. Then I saw all of my network. My family. My friends. My domain network. My business network. My logistics network. My cycling network and so many more. I had this belief with domains, with crypto, with my investment in NVIDIA in 2018, and now with how.com. I believe it will be an important fabric of the Internet and society. If you are interested, email me :) I also failed a lot, but I learned a lot to get to this point to make this one of my Magnum Opus.
This is my third swing at AI. My first was in 2007 when I acquired a company with semantic technology Visual Knowledge and invested $10m. It was not fast enough nor good enough. I was too early. Then in 2015 I built a mobile app that would listen to you as you played the piano to teach you but also turn the pages as you played. One of the developers was fresh out of University of Toronto. He went to intern at Microsoft in 2017 and then Google Brain. In 2019 he founded a company called Cohere and is CEO. It’s currently valued at $5.6B. Congrats Aidan! This will be my third swing and I believe the timing is perfect. It’s now an execution risk and a game of speed and reinvention!
Wisdom: Tune your mind to the frequency of greatness. Allow your brain to receive inspiration from up above, picking up signals (what I call insight and downloads) that manifest your dream.
Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is probably the reason so few engage in it.
Henry Ford (1863-1947)
My Life Question:
Man’s greatness lies in his power of thought.
Blaise Pascal (1623-1662)
How can you live your Magnum Opus?
You have a purpose and have a magnum opus, a great work, that only you can do. What is it?
My Life Lessons:
Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards
Søren Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
Everything has significance. Everything is connected. We just have to connect those dots forwards and backwards. It is easy to see those dots when we look backwards, and more difficult to see them looking forward. Thinking and the Subconscious mind can help you past to future and understand your present starting point.
Thinking is the key. You must plan in your heart but leave the outcome to God. You cannot just leave the outcome without planning, which is deeply tied to deep thought and your subconscious mind.
Next week:
Your Sixth Sense
This is your intuition, the silent voice that whispers WISDOM.
Intuition will tell the thinking mind where to look next.
Jonas Salk (1914-1995)
See you next Thursday!
Subscribe to my Compounding Wisdom newsletter and start transforming your life.
The One Thing that Skyrockets Your Success
The secret of all the most successful people in history
The secret of all the most successful people in history
The 80/20 principle states that 80% of outcomes come from 20% of efforts. Focus on the few things that truly matter, and success will follow.
Richard Koch (1950-present)
This principle changed my life. A lot.
This important 80/20 Principle, or Pareto's Principle, was taught to me, but I didn't really understand it until decades later. Do you?
The results speak for themselves. If you applied 80/20, you would be in the top 1% of whatever field you applied the 80/20 Principle towards. You would be in the Top 1% quite easily and naturally. Yet most people rarely apply the 80/20 Principle, even if reminded time and time again.
1. Most things are not equal.
Just 7 companies (Apple, Microsoft, Facebook, Amazon, NVIDIA, Google, Tesla) account for 50% of the market (NASDAQ). If you had invested early in any of these companies, you too would be extremely wealthy. That is one easy way to get wealthy. I invested early in domains, Google and tech stocks and crypto. And NVIDIA in 2018.
80/20 math says that 20% of the inputs give you 80% of the results. This results in 4x or 400%. This is remarkable in a world where financial returns of 25% are 'great.' This is why Buffet buys stocks of 'companies' and not the stock index of the Top 500 companies.
In 2018, I sold 80% of my Google stock (which had 10x'd) and bought NVIDIA at $60. It has increased 25x in 6 years. Now, I am pondering what my next 10x stock will be.
There are 2,781 billionaires worth $14 trillion. The top 10 billionaires account for $1.6 trillion or 11.3%. The top 100 account for ~33%. The top 500 (20%) account for 70%. Close to 80/20. What do they do uniquely? 80/20 focus.
In terms of longevity, 2.5% of Americans (3% of females, 1% of males) will reach the age of 100. Of those who do achieve this century milestone, 0.02% will live another ten years. Less than 1 in 100,000 centenarians will make it to 115. Almost no one makes it to 120.
Longevity only matters if you are healthy. Otherwise, life will just get harder for longer. Health principles also follow 80/20.
Don't treat your 'to-do list' 'and 'not-to-do list' equally. Life operates on a logarithmic scale.
Don’t confuse activity with achievement.
John Wooden (1910-2010)
2. A very few things have the most impact.
Success is a few disciplines practiced every day.
Jim Rohn (1930–2009)
Very few things have tremendous value and impact. Finding and focusing on these vital few will leapfrog you ahead.
Warren Buffet played his financial game by limiting his financial decisions to 10 big bets, and Quentin Tarantino played his movie game by limiting himself to just ten movies.
80/20 means 20% input gives 80% output = 400%. If good is 25% returns, then 400% is 16x greater than good at 25%. Therefore, 80/20 results in greatness. Focus on 80/20 to be great. It's that simple but hard to do consistently. Focus on 80/20 consistently each day.
What ten bets will you place in your lifetime? I like to think of one big bet every decade.
I applied this to one of my businesses, BlackFriday.com. We reduced 1500 affiliate retail companies to 300 (20%), giving us 90% of the revenues. Sixty companies of these gave 70% of the revenues. Twelve companies gave 50% of the revenues. We eventually reduced it to just 60 companies, reducing our work of managing 1440 companies. We created new revenues by offering sponsorship placements to the top 12 companies. We did 90% less work but made 4x more money.
3. The 80/20 Principle is fractal.
Big doors swing on little hinges.
W. Clement Stone (1902–2002)
I learned from 80/20 Sales and Marketing, written by a good friend, Perry Marshall, that 80/20 is fractal. This means that inside every 80/20, there is another 80/20.
So out of 100 things, there is only one thing that matters a lot:
1st 80/20 Fractal:
20 things give you 80% results.
2nd 80/20 Fractal:
Twenty percent of those twenty things (four things) will provide you with 80 percent of the 80 percent results (64%).
I.e. four things give you 64% of the results.
3rd 80/20 Fractal:
Of the four things that give you 64%, 20% of those four things (1 thing) will provide you with 80% of the 64% results (50%). I.e., one thing will give you 50% or half the results.
Bingo. Secret.
Confused or crystal clear? Read it again.
So, find that one thing and focus on it. Or the four things that give you 64%. Or the 20 things that give you 80%. The key is to focus on the few things or (better yet) the ONE thing that gives you 50%.
Forget or ignore all the rest.
You are not programmed or taught to think or behave in this way.
You will remain ordinary without 80/20.
You can become extraordinary and fantastic with 80/20.
My Life Question:
If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.
Lao Tzu (601-531 BCE)
What do you want to be great at?
What is the one thing that would give you half your results?
Focus on that daily.
Make your list of possible ten that can be 80/20. Figure out the vital few.
Revise this list daily in the morning as you learn and experiment.
Find at least one 80/20 a month.
Imagine what your year will look like. Wow.
My Life Lesson Then (from my younger self):
Find your purpose in life. You do have one. It’s deep in your soul, buried under the layers of the scars of your heart. Unravel it and give it all your heart and soul.
Life is fractal, just like 80/20 is fractal.
When you find your 80/20 purpose, visualize it and find the one thing I call the domino you need to knock down for even bigger dominoes in life. You can apply this to your career/business, health, and relationships.
Write your goal and then draw five dominoes that would knock your goal down. You can knock down the first domino today, this week or this month—maybe this quarter.
Life Advice Now (from my present self):
Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship.
Buddha (563-483 BCE)
Relationships are 80/20 but don't do 80/20 transactions in your relationship. Relationships aren't transactional or about efficiency. Love fully and unconditionally. Forgive and forget. Love and cherish. These things can not be fully measured but are felt to be truly valuable.
Some people think their lives are about wealth, while others believe they are about health. As you get older, you realize your life is about deep, meaningful relationships and purpose. We call this love and legacy.
My Magnum Opus I envision is:
Health and Wellness Retreat with the world's healthiest restaurant and fitness centre with people I love and people in need of wellness
A Gospel Media Network with God.com, Heaven.com, Religion.com, and Jesus.com is leveraging technology and media to touch hearts and souls for eternity.
Next week:
The One Thing That Matters
The “F” word that has F, U, C but no K
“Do that which you fear to do, and the fear will die.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882)
See you next Thursday!
Subscribe to my Compounding Wisdom newsletter and start transforming your life.
7 Principles of Life
Are You Really Living Each Day?
Are You Really Living Each Day?
You were born with wings, why prefer to crawl through life?
Rumi (1207-1273)
I am now 54. How many more years? How many more days? To live. To matter. To dream. To do. If I am average, I have just 10,000 more days!
When I was in my 20s and 30s, I thought I had lots of time. Now, I think I have about five projects I can do with strength and vigour. I am more aware of why Warren Buffet reserved ten slots to invest well. He said he envisioned a punch card with ten slots, and every time he invested, there would be one less slot. Quentin Tarantino only planned to make ten movies. He has made nine thus far. One more left. Wow. I can't wait for his 10th and final film.
I have many dreams, but I have narrowed my list to the following: a Broadway musical, an AI company, a health and wellness retreat at Camp Howdy, publishing a series of books, three movies, and Gospel Media Network… Which ones shall I do first?
Life is short, but there is enough time to do what you are uniquely positioned to do, that only you can do. I have thought a lot about the principles of life. There are many, but if I had to boil it down to just seven, these would be the top for me.
1. You are a miracle. A unique miracle who will never walk this earth again.
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.
Mark Twain (1835-1910)
Out of the tens of millions of sperm cells from your father and one of the half a million egg cells, you are the unique genetic and environmental combination that will never exist again. You are truly unique. You seek to belong, to have purpose and meaning. That which we seek will eventually be found, but you must ask, seek and knock with all your heart, all your mind and all your strength. The world is waiting for you to reveal your heart. Someone is waiting for you. That has always been my philosophy, even when I was in despair or felt invisible. But after decades of seeking, I am discovering myself, finding my tribe, and voicing my heart. It may be one person (me) or some others who feel similarly or aspire to a greater vision and version of themselves, but I know each of us is here for a reason. Just like your chair, your table, your bed.
2. You are born upside down. You need to be born upright.
Being born again means becoming who you were always meant to be.
Siri Mitchell (1965-present)
My first child, Jessi, was about to be born, but she wasn’t coming out. She was feet first. A footling breech. We had an emergency C-section. She was fine and it was one of the most glorious days of my life to hold her in my arms.
The natural way to be born is head first. This means almost everyone in the world is born upside down. I believe that while you walk this earth, you need be once again be born rightside up- upright. We all wish to be upright before a Creator and our fellow man. Sometimes we lose our way and feel like we are tumbling around all over the place, stuck in sin and in guilt. We honour those who have integrity, who admit their faults, who are humble, who sacrifice, who serve, who are trustworthy, who are good and kind. We do so because they are being upright. Plant your feet firmly on the ground and stand upright, stand tall, and be who you are meant to be.
3. Your days are numbered, but you believe you are immortal.
Teach us to number our days so we may have a heart of wisdom.
Moses (1391 BC - 1271 BC)
We say ‘Friends forever’, ‘Love always’. We have eternity in our hearts and yet we know that just as we have a birthday, we will also have a death day. Most do not think about this latter day. We see it on tombstones. In my quotes, I reference the year of the quoter’s birth and their death. It is a reminder that we are mortal, that we should be wise to spend each of our days, as if it were our last. Memento mori - ‘remember death’ is wise. It seems sombre and grim, but it reminds us to be grateful for each moment, each breath, each person, whether good or bad, for everything is a tutor for us, if we have the eyes and ears to sense. Steve Jobs never believed in an ‘off’ button, because he believed life persisted forever. His products tried to eliminate this on/off button. We will one day have an off button but our souls and spirits will persist. That is forever in our hearts.
Don’t count the days; make the days count.
Muhammad Ali (1942-2016)
4. You are just water, dust and air. But you have a soul and spirit too.
The soul is placed in the body like a rough diamond, and must be polished, or the luster of it will never appear.
Daniel Defoe (1660-1731)
We are 70% water, just like the earth. Why water? We are but recycled dust for the remainder of our bodies. We have iron. Why? We have metals like Selenium, Magnesium. We breathe air, but why? 80% of our cells are red blood cells. 20-30 trillion red blood cells (rbc). Each rbc has 270 million hemoglobin! Each hemoglobin can hold 8 oxygen molecules. This blood must flow so that it supplies this oxygen to the rest of our cells- to produce energy (ATP) in the mitochondria in our cells. It’s complex but we don’t even have to think about it. Just breathe and life happens. We can then use our thoughts, our minds and our spirits to create amazing things that nourish and inspire one another. This is the gift, our creations, our innovations. We have become like gods, creating and destructively innovating to the heavens above. Our bodies are just temporary vehicles for our soul and spirit that longs to live forever.
5. What separates you from life and death is just a breath. But that breath of life has more power than anything in this universe when combined with love.
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Maya Angelou (1928-2014)
We breathe 12 times a minute all the time. The minute we stop breathing (try holding your breath for a minute), we start to suffer. Four minutes without oxygen, our brain stops working. After five minutes, we are no longer alive. Just 5 minutes separates us from the living to the dead. Grim. How are we so fragile?
While we have breath, we desire to share this breath with others. With some, it is a deep and lasting love. Others, a seasonal love. And sometimes heartbreak, when our breath ceases, we part from loved ones.
When breath combines with love, it is the most potent force in the universe. There is nothing more powerful. This is the most important principle in the universe and is contained in one word: LOVE.
When the breath is unsteady, all is unsteady. When the breath is still, all is still.
Hatha Yoga Pradipika (15th century)
6. You are love, but that love is trapped inside your soul and spirit.
Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
Rumi (1207-1273)
We are love incarnate, but that love is wrapped and encased in protective layers we have built so that our hearts never get hurt. Love wishes to escape and express itself through thoughts, emotions, words, works, and actions, but rejection and criticism imprison it again. The layers of encasements over the years make us invulnerable, 'protected,' but we are now entombed alive, our hearts buried, and the grounds of our hearts hardened and loveless.
Let love be free. Let it endear other's hearts. Love hurts because it is sacrifice.
The 30 trillion red blood cells each gave up its nucleus, its life, and thus lived only 120 days in the service of the rest of your cells. This is an expression of love embedded in your life, in your body, for an example to follow. Serve, provide love and life to others, and forgive and take away their hurt and wastes of life.
7. You wish to do all that is in your heart, but to do that you must rest deeply and be still.
He that can take rest is greater than he that can take cities.
Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)
While we spend most of our thoughts and time in activity, the law of life requires that for one day a week, we rest completely, pondering life and our purpose.
Each day, we are also required to rest, not only sleep. And each hour we also require rest. Each moment we blink, we rest. Each moment we breathe, our heart and our body rest. After we exercise intensely, it is followed by rest.
We must be still and rest, not only in our bodies but also in our soul and spirit. Our minds must rest. But we are bombarded more than ever, and there is no separation between work and life, family and self. COVID tried to teach us and ask us, "What is essential? What really matters? If you are quarantined alone, what is life without anyone else?" We must rest a short while, but then we must reconnect deeply with others, with the world, to serve and give.
My Life Questions:
The purpose of life is to be defeated by greater and greater things.
Rainer Maria Rilke (1875-1926)
1. What will you start doing today that you dreamed about all your life?
Only you can search deep into your heart and mine this out. Seek it deeply and start today, as soon as you can. What is your first step? Do it. What is your next step? Place the last step to your dream and work backwards. And pray. Amen means "Let it be so."
My Life Lessons Then (from my younger self):
God has given us two hands, one to receive with and the other to give with.
Billy Graham (1918-2018)
1. I thought I had lots of time to do all that I wanted.
Experiment to find the ten things you want to do in life. Write and narrow your list down to 10. Continually revise and replan as you discover yourself.
2. I dreamed a lot but realized action is equally as important as dreaming.
We only have one life on this earth. Please don't waste it idly. Press on diligently, like the ant. In their short lives, they teach us that we are part of a community that serves.
3. I am a romantic idealist.
I always dreamed of 'happily ever after in love.' My mother died in 2006. I fell sick and ill. I was heartbroken many times. I failed many times in school and business. But I still dream of 'happily ever after.' I get back up after I am knocked down. One day, I won't be able to get up. But my spirit will live on. Happily ever after.
Life Advice Now (from my present 54 year old self):
Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.
Mark Twain (1835-1910)
1. Love deeply, self first and then others more.
Seek to know yourself deeply. This is the first law. But even more is to love yourself deeply. Then, love others deeply. Besides, there is only one greater law. To love God. But if you cannot love yourself, how can you love others? If you cannot love others, how can you love God?
2. Forgive always. It is the greatest gift you can give.
Whether someone apologizes or not, forgiveness is the greatest expression of love and is even more powerful when given without an apology.
3. Wander outwards but eventually come home to your heart and then give your heart everywhere.
You always have to come to your true home—your heart. All life and love stem from the heart. Keep your heart pure and cleanse it from the stains of this world and yourself. Love always.
To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.
Lewis B. Smedes (1921-2002)
Next week:
7 Principles of Blood
You understand life If you understand blood.
In every drop of my blood, there is life, and in every beat of my heart, there is love.
See you next Thursday!
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7 Life Crisis Moments - The First 4: Identity, Belonging, Purpose, Relationships
It isn’t a question of if, it’s a question of when.
It isn’t a question of if, it’s a question of when.
The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it.
W. M. Lewis (1878-1945)
Life is a miracle. The sun, 192 million miles away, gives us light and warmth. The clouds give us rain. The seas and mountains are the calm and majestic grandeur of being. Like the waves that toss to and fro in the storm, some moments in life swell our souls up and down through the vortex of crisis. We have seven major life crisis moments. Each one a major challenge, but also necessary as steps for growth. These crises are universal, through which every person must traverse. I am in the final two life crisis moments, having passed five.
Crisis of Identity (Youth)
The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.
Carl Jung (1875-1961)
Who am I? I am not my body. I cannot see my soul or my spirit. The world tells and taunts me to conform — just fit in. They tell us who we should be. Don't stick out and be myself. Societal norms and our education label us and conform us, and we tend to gravitate to a standard, and so we lose our individuality and the development of our soul and spirit.
I often stared at the sun, pondering this question. I read books to explore the human spirit. I travelled in these writings far and wide and felt I was not yet myself. My family life was in disarray. My father left us, and my mother, reconciling with him, moved us from London, Ontario, to Vancouver, Canada.
You are not defined by external labels or circumstances, I realized. I am shaped by my values, and my words and my behaviour shape my reputation. I was both a sinner and a saint. I would try to lean into the saint side of me. I would embrace this journey of self-discovery, a lifelong process to answer this age-old question: Who am I?
I am me. I am Kevin Ham. I am a dreamer who dreams of doing something great for my fellow humans — to inspire, to help others unlock the heart of their human potential, and also do great things myself. I would be a healer of souls. I would be a renaissance man, living and creating the dreams in my heart. Diving deep into my heart, I would explore myself, unearth the gold deep inside of me, and show it through pictures, words, poetry, books, musicals and movies.
To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.
Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882)
Crisis of Belonging (Adolescence)
True belonging doesn’t require you to change who you are; it requires you to be who you are.
Brené Brown (1965-)
My father left his job at Ford and started his own business, a grocery store called Pinto. I would see the bags of coins he brought home. I would take handfuls of coins, go to school, and give them to my classmates. That was my way of quickly making a lot of friends. I did this until the teacher told my parents.
Where do I belong? That is the next question we need to answer. While we start to discover ourselves, we quickly realize that we need to be part of something greater than ourselves to fit in yet be authentic. Peer pressure to conform to the group to belong outstrips the desire to be who we truly are. Do we fit into predefined, predetermined moulds and lose ourselves in the pursuit of acceptance?
It forces us to absolve our identity in return for acceptance and belonging. We encase our spirit and soul with layer upon layer of armour that protects us from being hurt. We shield our inner selves and mask ourselves to look and feel part of our tribe. We no longer unsheathe or unclothe our hearts to be vulnerable.
But despite being part of the tribe, we don't feel we truly belong until we find a person or cause that allows us to put our guard down and be truly vulnerable — to speak and feel with our hearts.
True belonging comes from self-acceptance, not the airs of conformity and camouflage. It happens when you connect with people who see and appreciate your authenticity.
Value depth over breadth of relationships and seek out people who value you for who you truly are rather than what they want you to be.
The ache for home lives in all of us, the safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned.
Maya Angelou (1928-2014)
Crisis of Purpose (Early Adult)
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.
Mark Twain (1835-1910)
But why am I here? I want to do something in this world, but what? I want success, but what is success for me? We are told to get a good education, a good job, a good salary, and a good title and position. Without a deep purpose, these feel hollow.
It is said there are two most important days in your life: the day you are born and the day you understand and know why. The first was September 25, 1970. The second was August 5, 1986, the day I first believed in God, when I was born again.
It is the reason I keep going. I dream of building God.com, Religion.com, and Heaven.com once I get Jesus.com. I obtained the first three over 7 years, and the last one is still pending after 24 years.
I just came back from Guatemala, where I gave two health talks on the 7 Principles of Life and the 7 Principles of Blood. I felt that this is what I love to do. I connected these principles to body, mind, and spirit.
The pursuit of purpose isn't about achieving a title or status. It's about finding work and a way of life that brings deep meaning to your life and fills your spirit with joy and peace. Instead of focusing on external reward and validation, focus on internal fulfillment and peace.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.
Viktor Frankl (1905-1997)
Crisis of Relationships (20s/30s)
People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
Maya Angelou (1928-2014)
I am a romantic. Aren't we all? We dream of princes and princesses, fairy tale endings, and happily ever after. The Bible tells the story of Adam. He was given authority over all creation. Then, he was asked to name all the animals. As he named them one by one, he saw that each animal had a mate, male and female. This is what he lacked. He had no soul mate, even though he was all-powerful and perfect. His soul lacked love.
Then, from his rib was made a woman, Eve, bone of his bones and flesh of his flesh, and the two became one — two bodies, one heart.
In the pursuit of success and ambition, relationships are in the background. Instead, they should be the most important. It isn't for what we live but for who we live our lives for and with. Our spirit and soul desire a deep-seated connection with someone who matters most to us and who matters deeply to us. This feeling of love on so many levels, whether it is friends, family, or a life partner, fills our souls with love.
Love is the most potent force in the world. Kings fall under its sway and give up their thrones. Love is blind because it does not adhere to the rules and laws of cultures, religions and countries. Love has no boundaries. Who matters most in your life? Prioritize them always. All that you do is for them.
Relationships are not just maintained; they are nurtured and cultivated with love, genuine care, and empathy over a long time. Make sure you create these moments, taking the time to make people feel special.
Find your true loves in all facets of your life.
Intense love does not measure, it just gives.
Mother Teresa (1910–1997)
My Life Questions:
Man is not what he thinks he is, he is what he hides.
André Malraux (1901–1976)
Who am I?
Sometimes, it is helpful to break this question down into sub-questions.
What are your three core values? Write them down.
What are the dreams in your heart? Write them down.
What are the plans to make your dreams come true? Write them down, experiment, and redefine this plan often as you navigate them.
My Life Lessons Then (from my younger self):
The most common form of despair is not being who you are.
Søren Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
1. Be true to yourself. Focus deep.
You may go far and wide, but eventually, you must go deep into your heart and explore its depths for your fears, dreams, and being.
2. Never quit.
It's easy to quit because sometimes life becomes too hard. I often thought of suicide when I was younger. But I didn't want to disappoint my mom. If I had lost her early, I perhaps would have had no hope. When we are in moments of despair, we may call it quits. At these times, we must go deep and resolve never to quit. I made that decision. I think it was the best decision of my life. Maybe I will fall into despair again in the future. But this lesson has stayed deep in my soul.
3. There is always hope. There is always love.
I thought I would never find love. But as I found love, I marvelled that love found me. It wasn't perfect, but love is overlooking all the imperfections, yet still loving. I realized that love is everywhere if you open your eyes and heart widely. There are so many people in this world looking for love. It's not just one soul mate you have in this world, but potentially millions—each unique and different. Like hide-and-go-seek, you must seek the love, define that love and let that love grow once found.
Life Advice Now (from my present 53 year old self):
One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful.
Sigmund Freud (1856-1939)
1. Forever in my heart
I seek eternity in things--to live a life beyond myself. Out of this body, I wish to pen words and thoughts for future generations. I want to make modern musicals and movies that stir the soul and move the heart.
Forever is a lifetime of being and living and dreaming.
Each of us has this within us.
2. Only one
You don't need a whole lot. Just one. One love. One purpose. One friend. It helps to have one more just in case something happens to the one, which we know, given time, it will. Then, we live in the moments, in the memories. My mother died in 2006, but I still think of her often. It was hard growing up under her strictness and her high expectations for me to do something great, to live her dreams. But I am who I am because of those struggles, those expectations. I did not let them put me in despair but rather used them as stepping stones to build my character and life as I struggled through them.
Find that one.
3. Purpose. Never forget.
Just do it. Let His will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
Next week:
Life Failures, Mortality and Legacy.
Are you doing what you are born to do?
Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.
Robert F. Kennedy (1925-1968)
See you next Thursday!
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